Thermal

Another genius idea for a website that is both hilarious and scary: Speak Your Branes.

The neatest way of summing up the site is contained within it’s URL: ifyoulikeitsomuchwhydontyougolivethere.com

What they’ve done is simply trawl through the BBC’s Have Your Say site, where ‘ordinary people’ get to comment on the day’s stories and filter out the scariest, funniest and downright depressing examples of a modern Briton slavering over their keyboard in righteous indignation.

Then add a sarcastic comment on to it:

An old one I just found, on the death of Michael Crichton.

Why ask me for my reaction – I’ve no idea who he was.
Douglas Lee, London

I like to imagine Douglas in a permanent state of shock, leafing incredulously through rail timetables full of destinations he’s not intending to travel to and TV schedules full of programmes he doesn’t watch.

Lovely.

Or we have the delightful Ian Jempson apparently from ‘revolutionsville’:

Instead of a database containing our private movements , perhaps a more effective border police force , proper imigration checks coupled with really harsh hard punishments from the courts like hanging for planting bombs would stem the flood of crime ! Lets face it we are the dumping ground for the european criminals they are here all ready

Right. Hanging will deter suicide bombers will it? Which bits do we hang then, assuming we find any?

If you love internet stupidity, then Speak your Branes is the place for you. Just make sure you don’t get quoted on it……

Apparently it costs 9,000 of our English pounds to keep a teenager for a year – I’m sure the Curmudgeon can translate this into American as he has had/is having 4 kids through this larval stage and has been there, seen that and can no longer afford the T-shirt.

But why is this? David Mitchell has done some thinking on the subject and has  picked the pimple quite accurately thus:

But massive teenage spending has become the premise on which much of our economy, and popular culture, is based….. One of the fastest growing areas in our economy in the years leading up to the crunch was the selling of crap to twats. Why waste a fortune expensively marketing carefully designed products to the thrifty middle-aged with long-established spending patterns when you can make a quick million pushing ringtones and cheese strings to kids?

Exactly. Anyone who has endured commercial TV in the last few years will have felt distinctly untargeted if they’re over the age of 18 and things ain’t going to get any better.

Of course, in my day things were different and we used to make our own entertainment and [fades into senile ramblings about lost youth......]

This from b3ta, this from the BBC – there is uncomfortably little difference….

For those of you old enough to remember Missile Command, here’s a cool little game for you: Mutually Assured Destruction.

Quite simple, use the mouse to fire missiles at the incoming rocket attack. Fire in front of them to take out more at once, and upgrade your base as you go. Sure to make those hours at ‘work’ go quicker.

Look at the pretty explosions!

Akismet is a very useful anti-spam plugin, which has kept literally tens of thousands of spam comments off my blogs, but sometimes you have to wonder….

In the last 24 hours both Claire & Melissa, who have been visiting this place longer than is good for them, have been sent to the sin bin, whilst some vacuous moron called ‘World of Warcraft’ posted a ‘nice site’ comment which was let through. Bah.

Apologies ladies……

Add Nurses, Counsellors, carers……. I used to wonder how politicians could sleep at night, then I realised they couldn’t care less. It’s a funny old world.

More from the incisive mind of Barry Deutsch at Ampersand.

Mmmm, gadgets.

Actually you probably can have too many gadgets, as you will have noticed when visiting the kind of blog that launches three different genres of music upon you at once, along with the ‘What kind of XXX are you?’ quizzes all of which are vaguely reminiscent of Homer Simpsons ‘Mr X’ website.

However I think the little hamster gadget in the previous post is pretty cool (did you know you could feed him? just click anywhere in the frame-you can make him do some other stuff too) and he’s the work of the fertile imgaination of Adam Bowman – get your own customisable hamster, or something else like the tree frog below – you can feed him by clicking too…..

Whether you like football or not, you should appreciate the skills of Remi Gaillard as he has an eye for goal wherever he is: Police Stations, McDonalds, the Eiffel Tower, or my particular favourite, the French speed trap van. The sight of that flat-footed cop chasing him down the street as he does cartwheels will live with me for a long time……

It comes to us all……

More pinsharp observation on a Tee-shirt at BustedTees.com.